The Gift of Finding the Financial Independence, Retire Early Movement

I remember so clearly dragging myself through the front door after another 9-5, tired and drained as I collapsed onto the sofa—the same ritual every evening. As I mindlessly scrolled through Netflix options, a thought pierced through my fatigue: 'Is there nothing more?’ and the following thought that really stopped me cold was imagining myself years from now—still dragging myself home, still collapsing on this same sofa—but with little faces looking up at me, needing the energy and presence I'd already given away to my job. I had been following society's script perfectly—university, job, apartment, partner, marriage. Each box dutifully checked off. But as I sat there in my supposedly successful life, that question haunted me. It wouldn't leave me alone. It pulled at me until I finally pushed myself off that sofa and opened my laptop, fingers hovering over the keyboard as I typed the words I'd never searched before: 'alternative ways of living’.

That's when I stumbled across four letters that would change everything: F.I.R.E. Financial Independence, Retire Early. As I clicked through blog after blog, forum after forum, I felt something I hadn't felt in months—hope.

Here were teachers in their thirties retiring to travel the world, engineers living in tiny homes, couples who'd traded corner offices for coffee shops in Bali. People who'd figured out how to buy back their time. For the first time, I wasn't the only one questioning the script. I had found my tribe—people who believed life was meant to be lived, not just survived.

While I was up until midnight reading FIRE blogs and calculating our savings rate, my husband listened with the patient smile of someone watching their partner discover a new hobby. But when I explained what it could actually mean for us his expression shifted. We could make decisions based on what we actually wanted to do, not what we had to do to pay the bills. Work part-time, start our own companies, maybe even take a year off to travel—all without the constant anxiety of money dictating our every move. After that he became my steady co-pilot in what felt like my wild new adventure.

But dreaming about financial freedom and actually achieving it are two different things. The question became: how do we actually save 50% of our income without living like monks? We started looking at every purchase through a new lens: Does this move us closer to freedom, or further from it? Suddenly, that 4000kr sideboard at the furniture store looked absurd when we could find one for 300kr on Facebook Marketplace. So we started buying almost everything second hand. And I mean everything: clothes, furniture, cars, sheets, decorations, phones.

But cutting expenses went beyond just buying used. Every night became cooking at home night. The local bar was replaced by our living room, where we'd share a bottle of wine that cost less than a single cocktail. I traded my daily train pass for an electric bike.

At first, it felt like deprivation. But something funny happened—we started taking pride in our finds, in how much we could save, in how little we actually needed to be comfortable. We weren't just saving money; we were discovering what actually made us happy. Turns out, it wasn't the expensive restaurants or designer clothes—it was time together, the forest, and the growing number in our savings account that represented future freedom.

Then life threw us a curveball that changed everything: we had children. Suddenly, the FIRE plan that had felt so perfect seemed completely backwards. Why should we grind away the years when our children were small and wanted nothing more than our presence, just so we could be free when they were teenagers who barely wanted to talk to us?

So we changed our plan. But here's what I am forever grateful for: that restless feeling on the sofa that pushed me towards creating financial stability. Because now, when I wanted to take an extra full year of parental leave, I could choose that without stressing about money. When I want to work part-time to be home for afternoon pickups, I can. If I want to go back to school or shift professions or start my own business we have the financial cushion for it. And this is freedom for me. We'll still reach financial independence—just a couple years later, and with so much more presence and connection along the way.

The goal wasn't early retirement anymore—it was being present with our children now.